Journaling Through Motherhood: A Busy Mom's Toolkit
All Mamas Need Journaling
When this blog post was first published in 2021, it was the first blog post I wrote postpartum after having our baby girl. After over 12 hours of unmedicated labor, I officially became a mom to an amazing baby girl. My husband and I became a mommy and a daddy. Originally, this post was written as a way for new moms to talk about the role of journaling in the postpartum journey and newborn phase. Now, this post is more of an invitation to use journaling as a tool for lots of different aspects of motherhood. Motherhood is a remarkable journey filled with joy, laughter, and countless moments that you don’t want to miss. Yet, amidst the chaos, it's easy for busy moms to feel overwhelmed by the demands of nurturing a family, managing a variety of household items, and balancing work-related tasks. In the whirlwind of diapers, playdates, and bedtime routines, moms need to carve out moments for themselves, moments for reflection, and ultimately use journaling as an outlet for self-care. In this blog post, I invite you to explore practical tools for planning, goal-setting, continuous learning, and stress management. All by using a notebook or journal as your sidekick.
This blog post’s lineup:
👶 Journaling in the Newborn and 0-1 Phase: Use your journal as a way to help keep track of newborn chaos: Diaper changes, feedings, milk supply, and more. Use a notebook in the postpartum process to have an outlet for feelings and adjustment.
📓 Planning for Peace: Discover how journaling can become your trusted ally in organizing the chaos. From meal planning to coordinating schedules, I’ll outline creative journaling techniques that help busy moms streamline tasks, making room for more quality time with their little ones.
🎯 Goal-Setting for Growth: Embark on a journey of personal and familial growth by incorporating goal-setting into your daily journaling routine. I’ll explore how setting realistic and achievable goals can bring focus and a sense of accomplishment to your hectic days.
📚 Learning Through Reflection: Learn how reflective journaling can become a powerful tool for personal development, helping you navigate the challenges and celebrate the triumphs of your unique motherhood journey. You can also use a notebook to focus on your learning, interests, and hobbies.
💆♀️ Managing Stress with Journaling: Stress is an inevitable companion. Uncover effective journaling strategies that act as a release valve for stress, providing a safe space for processing emotions and fostering resilience in the face of life's ups and downs.
Grab the Freebie
Interested in creative writing as a way to help reduce stress? Grab the free Mama, You Are a Storyteller workbook. 90 prompts related to the ins and outs of motherhood.
Let’s Start at the Beginning: The Newborn Phase
We had everything ready. The nursery was all set, our hospital bags were packed and waiting, and we had taken all of the recommended classes. Then, baby girl came early. We soon discovered that there were so many things we did not know. In so many ways we were ready, and in so many ways we found out what many people know: You aren’t really ever ready. I underestimated the role of journaling in my postpartum recovery. I originally wanted to take a moment to post on the blog about the power of journaling in the postpartum period. This post calls for a journal to be on your nightstand when you return home from the hospital or to even pack one in your hospital bag. Journaling created a space for me to share my feelings, make plans, figure out new information, and learn how to be a mom. It was also something nobody told me I needed as an essential item when we brought baby girl home from the hospital.
The transition to mommyhood is tough. I know that this is common knowledge, but woah. I didn’t know how tough. New schedules, feeding, crying, not sleeping, finding time to be alone, showering, a new relationship dynamic with your partner, learning new information, recovering and healing physically from birth (vaginal or c-section), feeling all emotions and feelings at one time, completing everyday tasks, and more. Everything in the first month after birth feels like chaos mainly because it is a whirling tornado of diapers, feelings, and watching your newborn asleep in their bassinet to make sure they are breathing (when they finally get to sleep). A journal is a critical tool for a first-time mom and any mom who needs to get the chaos out of her head and onto a piece of paper.
The Why of Postpartum Journaling
So, why is having a notebook critical? Simply because one of the keys to not feeling overwhelmed is to make the tasks, feelings, learning, and planning needed to be a mom feel more manageable. You may have seen cute or amazing bullet journal layouts or spreads. This post isn’t about that. If you feel like you need to do that after having a baby as a form of art therapy, please do so. But, I would set the bar extremely low for thinking about how your journal looks during the postpartum period. I was not worried about a monthly setup, more so, I was concerned that I was feeling overwhelmed with all of the things I did not know, all of the emotions involved with the hormonal crash, and navigating how to be a good mom and still feel like myself. There are 5 ways that a journal is an important tool in the journey of a first-time (or any time) mom including an outlet for feelings, note-taking, recording newborn moments, planning, and writing down questions for appointments.
Outlet for Feelings
Feelings come first. Postpartum depression* and the baby blues are common situational and conditional feelings after birth. I will say right up front that this post is not an expert opinion on PPD or baby blues, but I can almost guarantee that any parent will have all the feelings with adding a little one to the family. This time period right after birth is when you are most sleep-deprived and everything feels chaotic. A journal helps the brain dump emotions when everything doesn’t feel like it makes sense. Also, if you are engaging in talk-therapy after birth it is a way to record and ultimately learn to cope with how you are feeling. There are tons of reasons why feelings come up. Here are some common feelings:
Overwhelm with new tasks and balancing old tasks in the household
Self-esteem and feelings toward your body and body image
Resentment toward perceived freedom and communication with your partner
Adjusting to life as a new parent
Coping with the physical pain of postpartum recovery
Loss of competency over learning new tasks
Loss of freedom or independence
*Note: If you are feeling down or not yourself, please reach out to your doctors or medical team to discuss how you are feeling. If you want more information about Postpartum Depression or Baby Blues here is a great resource from WebMD.
Note-Taking
I am a teacher, so I immediately reached for my notebook to take notes on all of the things I didn’t know as a new mom. The postpartum period is student mode. Those of us who feel like independent experts on things will fall prey to the realization that we don’t know everything. While there is no way to know everything, I was determined to become a student of mommyhood. I researched sleep strategies, wake times, feeding information, among countless other things. I would find myself forgetting about breastmilk storage information or when I needed to take notes to reach out to the lactation consultants. I was inundated with new information, and a notebook helped me take notes on the class of life I was getting from my new daughter. When I couldn’t figure out the answers on my own, I had a start of the information available in my notebook to ask the experts.
Questions to Ask Doctors
In the note-taking section, I wrote down all of the things I was learning. However, I would also get overwhelmed by all of the things I had questions about. There wasn’t enough time to Google the answers needed. I would write down a list of questions to ask my doctors or to ask her doctors at our visits. It was encouraging because like during pregnancy, the list became shorter and shorter with more information that I gathered along the way. I also find that I can become easily flustered as a new mom and forget to ask big things that were weighing on my mind when I was sitting in appointments. If I had my list, I knew that all of my questions would get answered-big and small-and that I would feel a little more at ease. One of my favorite mantras was to tell myself that I wanted to ask all questions no matter how silly or obvious they sounded so I could become a more knowledgeable mama. I know that we can’t ask about what we don’t know, so I think this part is powerful for those new moms to write down general topics to ask experts as well.
Newborn Moments I Don’t Want to Forget
One way I found myself grabbing my journal off of the nightstand was to write down moments with our daughter that mattered. Some of the events of being a new mom are so hard. My feelings around healing or how my body looked in my mind or even using the bathroom after giving birth made it easy to get into a negative place. When you are sleep deprived, worried, anxious, and vulnerable in learning new information, it is easier to get lost in the moments and not focus on the aspects of happiness that can bring such light to the immediate postpartum period. I would revisit this list on the tough days or in the harder moments to make a shift in my mind.
Moments like:
The way my husband interacted with our daughter
My husband making oreo shakes for us on really rough days
How she fell asleep on my chest for the first time
The first time she got dressed in “real clothes” to meet new people
How I felt when we put her in the car and left the house for the first time
Planning
I am a Type A planner. However, during this time the biggest help has not been a full month layout that includes both monthly and weekly overviews. I have found that it has been the most beneficial tool to use one monthly layout to keep track of upcoming appointments for doctor’s visits, physical therapy, and family visits. I can also make my monthly goals at the top that seem far less daunting than trying to hit goals week-by-week. In the initial postpartum period, it was hard enough to think about showering, brushing my teeth, getting dressed, and out of the door within an hour. I found that by month two going into three I was able to start thinking about my bigger plans and what the goals about going back to work would look like on paper and in action.
The How of Postpartum Journaling
Find Your Method of Journaling
First, find the method of journaling that will work for you. You can use any notebook or journal that is blank and has room to write. I loved my small journal because I could throw it into my purse or diaper bag for appointments, and I kept my pencil close by when I had a thought or idea. You can also use voice recording apps, voice memos, or a Google Doc if you are still around a computer. Remember, the goal is to get your ideas out of your head and onto a piece of paper.
Find the Time
After birth, journaling will be one of the farthest things from your mind. I am an avid journal lover and user, and I couldn’t even think about putting pen to paper. If you are reading these during your pregnancy, I recommend trying to start a journal now. Get into the habit so when you are postpartum and ready to reach for your journal, it feels more natural. I have read other bloggers' posts that the only real goal you should have in the first 4 weeks postpartum should be to shower and brush your teeth. They aren’t wrong. However, there will come a time when you feel the itch to make life feel a little bit more...normal. When that itch comes, reach for your journal.
I struggled with finding times to journal, so I chose not to journal at first. I may have picked up a journal sooner if I had really looked at the open times I had for journaling during those first few months of postpartum. Here were some of my open times:
During pumping. I would often have 20 minutes of pumping to do and would end up sitting there staring at the Pinterest app on my phone in a sleepy daze. Once I discovered a hands-free nursing/pumping bra like this one, I quickly began to be able to multi-task again. Journaling and pumping became synonymous with each other.
During breastfeeding, you could do voice recording. They say we should start narrating everyday tasks for our newborns. This narration helps with language development. When you are breastfeeding it can take 30-45 minutes, so you can use the time to get out what you are thinking with a voice recording app and also work on building baby vocabulary.
Bedtime. This seems like the obvious one. However, you will be exhausted and may want to face plant into a pillow after you have been without sleep. Even if you take 5 minutes to journal a quick list, it will make you feel better about the lists in your mind starting to pile up. The first little bit of time that she was actually asleep were moments that I could be helping my mind settle down.
Naps. Our daughter was and is a nap fighter. She thinks naps were for quitters. When we asked the pediatrician about the lack of sleep during the day AND at night during the first couple of months, the response was along the lines of “you get what you get.” I now keep my journal nearby in case she gives us a nap early on during the day.
Tummy Time. This time happens on day one when you are working with your little one on strength. I would often have one hand on her trying to give her some encouraging words, and then another handwriting out a quick list in my journal.
Read more >>
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The Big List of Motherhood Affirmations for Journaling and Life
Defunk! Find Postpartum Positivity Using Mindset Shifts in your Journal
Moving Forward into Motherhood
While there are tons of systems and styles for planning, the goal of journaling in motherhood is to keep it simple and straight-forward. You can experiment with the style that works for you, and ultimately, journaling becomes a hobby all of its own. At first, you may want to try a more traditional layout of trying to house all of your areas of life in one notebook. You may also want to branch out and dedicate one type of notebook to one area of life. When I was a new mom, having a Passion Planner where I could track feedings, diaper changes, and questions for the doctor was really helpful. Now, I like to use a daily journal for notes, tasks, and appointments, and keep separate notebooks for the other areas of my life.
Goal-Setting and Planning
Begin by dedicating specific sections for planning, where you can jot down daily to-do lists, meal plans, and important dates. Embrace goal-setting by dedicating a page or section to your short-term and long-term aspirations. Utilize the journal's blank pages for brainstorming, mind mapping, and noting down insights gained along the way. The flexibility of any journal allows you to adapt and evolve your organizational system as your needs change, providing a tangible and personalized space for managing the beautiful chaos of motherhood. Whether it's the satisfaction of crossing off tasks, visualizing your goals, or simply having a central place for thoughts, any journal can be transformed into an invaluable companion on your journey through motherhood.
Learning & Hobbies
Embrace the blank pages as a playground for exploration, jotting down thoughts, ideas, and discoveries that reflect your own personal interests. Use dedicated sections to delve into topics that fuel your passions, be it literature, art, or a newfound interest like binge-watching a show. Turn your journal into a haven for self-expression, documenting your own learning journey alongside your children's milestones. Whether it's a quick sketch during naptime or a few lines reflecting on a fascinating article, the beauty of any journal lies in its adaptability to accommodate your evolving interests and serve as a tangible record of your personal growth and multifaceted identity beyond the role of motherhood. Let the pages of your journal weave a narrative that intertwines the intricacies of your life as a mom with the pursuit of your individual interests and hobbies.
Managing Stress
Use your journal as a confidant, non-judgmental listener to the highs and lows of your motherhood journey. Dedicate pages to pouring out your feelings, fears, and triumphs, providing a cathartic release that eases the weight on your shoulders. Incorporate mindfulness techniques, such as gratitude lists or deep-breathing reflections, to navigate stress and cultivate resilience. By acknowledging and processing emotions within the pages of your journal, you empower yourself to embrace the challenges of motherhood with grace, fostering not only self-awareness but also a profound sense of emotional well-being. Any journal, be it a simple notebook or a beautifully adorned diary, becomes a powerful instrument in your self-care toolkit, helping you find solace and balance amidst the demands of motherhood.
Read More >>
Writing Mindset Reflection:
How do you find time for journaling as a mom?
How do you make self-care a part of your immediate postpartum routine when it seems impossible?
How do you continue self-care through motherhood?
